Our Advice Blog

11

Beat Those January Blues

#januaryblues

January is often known for being a time when people feel a little gloomy after all the Christmas and New Year festivities. If you find yourself always thinking negatively and want to make a change then make 2016 the year you choose what’s important in your life and how you want to handle everyday situations.


Here are some examples of how you can change your outlook on life for the better.

You say…… Vicki says……
“My mock exam results were awful, I’m a failure” “There is a big difference between being perfect and being a failure and it’s unlikely you have failed in every area of the test. Have a chat to your teacher and ask where your weak points are so you can concentrate on improving them next time.”
“I hate my boobs, thighs, skin, hair….” “OK, this list can go on forever and that’s why it’s important to understand that none of us are perfect … even that girl that you see in the corridor who looks like she has it all, will stress over something! So rather than focusing on the 1% of you that you do not like, turn your attention to the 99% that you do like and then focus on showing off these areas of your body to their full potential.”
“I feel like people are always talking about me” “Just because someone whispers when you walk past does not mean you are at the heart of their conversation. So, rather than second guess what others may be saying, join in the chat or ask them what’s on their minds. Chances are you were wrong and there really was nothing to be worried about.”
“Boys always fancy my friend … I’ll never get a boyfriend” “If your vocabulary consists of the words ‘never’ or ‘always’ you are starting to form a negative thinking pattern. Change that sentence to ‘Ok this time I didn’t get the boy, but there will be other opportunities’. You’ll be surprised how a positive outlook can change the way you feel and the way others see you too!”
“What if my period starts in school, I’d be so embarrassed!” “Living in a world of ‘what ifs’ must be exhausting. Stop worrying about things that have not yet happened and most likely never will. It’s ok to consider different scenarios, but look at them positively, by saying ‘I can cope if this happens I just have to be prepared’ and have faith in your ability to manage any situations that life throws at you.”
Jayne says … “Wow you did great in the Art exam”
You say…”yeah but I suck at PE”
“Recognise that we can’t all be great at everything. Don’t play down your achievements when people say well done, by telling them what you’re not good at. Learn to take a compliment and compliment others when they have done well too!“
“I should have spoken up in class now I’ve missed my chance” “You can’t change the past so look to the future and get into the habit of saying to yourself, ‘It would have been great if I had answered that question, I’ll make sure I put my hand up next time.’ By adopting this attitude you are accepting that new opportunities are just around the corner ready to be seized.”

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Comments

Proud to be a teen

This advice really helped me because I was just looking for hair things for my conformation and I kept thinking "OMG I wish I had nicer looking hair!" And now I'm like "Well, I'm always in the pool, so it shouldn't really matter what my hair looks like when I can concentrate on the other parts of my face and body!"

Addie

thanks viki! I've been thinking negatively lately and haven't been very happy. the boy one spoke out to me. My crush Thomas used to date this girl El and I was upset. when they were dating. she and I were friends, but she ended up stabbing me in the back and we aren't friends anymore. ppl say that he still likes her but I'm not sure because his best friend is dating her. they had to break up because his mom didn't want him dating her. they got in a fight after that and they fell apart. now they could get back together. He is really nice, funny, and sweet. he is really a gentleman. People say that he might like me because he's rly nice to me but other ppl say that he's just a nice guy. that makes it worse. His mom LOVES me. she coaches me and she talks to my mom all the time about how me and Thomas should date. she loves me but I think he doesn't. his ex might still like him and he might still like her. any advice?

Sadsad

i guess it's hard to take away strong feelings liek hate and sadness but i try to think about what's coming up and things I'm looking forward to, like meeting friends.

confidence

I will try this

ashyB

What will my friend think of me when i tell her I've just started my period

hashtag January hater

why do i hate my boobs

peng ting banna

Sometimes I wake up in morning feeling sad , stressed, depressed . What can I do . Hellllppp!!!

ASK VICKI

If you have a question about periods, changes to your body or how you're feeling and can’t find the answer on here, ask Vicki for some advice. Just type in your question and press submit.

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If Vicki can help you, she'll post an answer in the ‘Your questions answered’ page, so don't forget to keep checking it
(and the best thing is nobody will ever know it was you that asked!)