Our Advice Blog

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Top Dating Tips

#askvicki , #dates, #firstlove

Dating sounds quite grown-up and you may be wondering what is expected of you. Do you hold hands on the first date? And do you hug or even kiss at the end of your date? The best advice is to take things slow, after all the most important part of the word ‘boyfriend’ or ‘girlfriend’ is ‘friend’ and that’s what you should be aiming to be before you become intimate with someone. When the time is right for kissing, you will know what to do naturally without it having to be pre-planned.

After spending weeks if not months plucking up the courage to ask that special someone out, you’re then left with the problem….what to do on your first date. Here are some ideas that might help:

  • The Aquarium - this will give you lots to talk about as you walk around
  • Bowling – excellent if you are not quite ready to be alone with your date
  • Crazy golf – fun and competitive
  • See a local band – great if you share the same taste in music
  • Be tourists – why not see what events are coming up in your home town
  • Ice-skating – a great way to get close as you hang on to each other to avoid tumbling over

Let your parents know you’re dating. Ok so they may tease you or raise an eyebrow but they have a responsibility to look after your well-being and need to know where you are and who you’re with. Why not ask if you can invite your date round one evening for dinner so they can get to know them a little better. Don’t be too upset if they insist on an ‘open door’ policy if you and your date go to your bedroom! Agree curfews too so there is no confusion as to what time you should be home.

Never be blackmailed or persuaded to do something you are not comfortable to do - even if your date uses the lines: “if you loved me, you would” or “if you don’t do this, I will break-up with you”. 

Tempting as it may be, your friends do not have to know all of the details of your relationship.

Make time to be with your friends when you’re dating someone. It’s totally understandable that you want to be with your date as much as you can but friends need attention too and in most cases will be around for many years.

Finally, don’t be too upset if you find after a while you and your date no longer share the same interests or even argue. Splitting up can happen to anyone and if it does, be the bigger person and accept it and move on with a view to remaining friends.

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Comments

Loulove123

I miss my boyfriend

Cc

I have a crush on this boy and I rly like him and we have just been put in the same forms I’ve told him I don’t like him but should I tell him I do?!?!

Xx123xX

I had a date with a boy i really like. And btw im 12. So he would say ly over txt and i thought that was him just being a boyfriend but then in public he said i love you and i just couldnt say it back. I think we were to youbg for that commitment but i dont think thats what he say it as. Cause i asked him about it and he said well thats what couples say. Anyway i broke up with him a week later and i told him it was because it was still akward. But now i feel bad cause it wasnt it was what he kept saying. Should i tell him or just leave it. It is 3 months on.

Replying to @nebula

Hi don't worry about not dating anyone yet, I'm 15, nearly 16, and I haven't dated either. Get to know these boys the best you can and from there decide who you want to possibly pursue something with but take it slow! Think about the guy who is nicest to you and that you think will treat you the best, this guy may not be the hottest guy in the world to other people but as long as he makes you feel good and you are both happy in your relationship, who cares? Make your decisions for yourself not based on who will make you look most popular etc. Hope you get to know these boys and they treat you great! As for the bookworm thing, do what you enjoy and you know what- it really does not matter if you're the most popular person at school or the girl every boy thinks is super hot because often these girls are super insecure and unhappy as they're having to compete with other girls and act a certain way to keep up this perfect image. I've always found that the super 'popular' girls aren't very well liked anyway- why would you want to be like that? I know it sounds really dumb but try hard in school and do what will be best for you in the long run- No one will remember or care about the popular people in 10 years time anyway. Good luck! Lia xx

Duckie girl

I'm dating a boy and I'm 11 I don't want to tell my parents because I'm too scared

Jessie pie

My boyfriend was so pushy in our relationship but I loved him but when he kept wanting to kiss me I broke up with him because I had had enough

Nebula

Hello, Nikki! I've never had a boyfriend. Everyone other girl has, though, and while I usually don't care what they think, it makes me feel more like an outsider than I usually do. There's two boys I know. They're both kind. I think one of them likes me, as he continuously stares at me and looks away when I look up at him. I'm wondering if this is the beginning of my "love life". Yet, I'm scared of everyone's reaction if I do get a boyfriend, because they seem to think of me as an awkward bookworm (which I am).

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