Our Advice Blog

38

KEEPING AND MAKING FRIENDS

#askvicki , #newfriends

This week Ask Vicki talks about the ups and downs of friendship.

Friendship isn't easy and during puberty the relationship you have enjoyed for many years with close friends can change.

You may be noticing a change to the way you and your friends look and act, they may be dressing differently or developing earlier than you. You may even notice that some of your friends have started to talk about dating when this is something you are not ready for. You could even feel a little jealous or left out if they do start dating or making new friends with other people.

Although many friendships remain strong and continue into adulthood it is important to understand that some will start to fade and this is perfectly normal. So try not to worry if you seem to spend less time with a friend, it may be that they have recently found people they have more in common with and it doesn’t have to mean the end of your friendship, you can still keep in contact with a weekly update on the phone or by dropping them an e-mail.

Rollercoaster Up’s and Down’s

If you’ve got a friend who seems to be happy one minute and then moody the next, don’t give up on them, let them know that you understand this is all because of puberty and hormones and that together you will find ways to manage the way they are feeling, I am sure they will be glad of your support.

Secondary School

Starting a new school can sometimes mean that you and your friends will be split up, they may go to a different school or you may find that they are put in a different form to you.

If this happens to you, try to make new friends in class and never get involved in saying unkind things about old friends behind their backs and avoid being with people that do.

Remember that friendships should be natural and never change the way you look or act to fit in with a new group, true friends will love you for who you are.

Finally, don’t get too hung upon on having just one ‘special’ friend, it is far healthier to have a wide group of friends to spend time with and to rely on when you need support.

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Comments

to ??me?? from Lily@bloggerteen

hi ??ME?? Friendships are often tested during puberty and I am sure your friends still like you, but like you emotions may be high and this often causes fights or fall outs. So next time when things are calmer, have a chat to the group, let them know how puberty is for you and ask if you can all work on making things better.

??me??

I feel like all my friends are starting to hate me any tips?

Dat lgbtq+ kid to Demigirl in need

First of all I don’t know ur pronouns so I will call u they/them . Second I’m so happy I have found someone who is part of the nonbinary Umbrella btw I’m actually a aromantic asexual lesbian who is nonbinary ( I go by they/ them pronouns) But I need to get to the point so maybe I should stop chatting about lgbtqia stuff ! I feel the same way sometimes and it is very hard when ur in a situation like this and I was a loner I’m primary due to how I dressed and what I liked so ur not alone . I recomend telling them how u feel and tell them that u know they might not mean it xx Hope this helps . If u need more support wether it’s lgbtqia related or not I’m happy too help <33 Ⓓⓞⓝ’ⓣ ⓛⓔⓣ ⓣⓗⓔⓜ ⓖⓔⓣ ⓣⓞⓞ ⓤⓡ ⓗⓔⓐⓓ

to DemiGirlInNeed

Hi, it sounds like you don't really feel that close to your friends. Whilst its ok to be the quiet one in the group (I am!) then try to join in the discussions. Also, try to meet up outside school cos it might make you closer. Keep hold of your friends but also if you are not really connecting them you could try to branch out and meet people with similar interests. Idk if that helps but have a great day :)

Girl life

I have lots of friends but sometimes I am at the edge of the group. There are five of us and we are pairs of a big group of friends. I don't have my pair. <3

Demigirlinneed

It sometimes feels like I don't have friends even if they are sitting right next to me. I was a loner in primary and I don't wanna go back there. Pls help xx

Dat lgbtq+ kid to rabbit lover

Make sure u have her on WhatsApp also get each over leaving gifts Ur welcome

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