Our Advice Blog

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#askvicki , #bullying

Bullying is when someone or even a group of people intentionally offend or physically hurt someone. It can happen for no reason and if it has happened to you or someone close to you, you will already know it can really knock a person’s confidence leaving them feeling very sad and alone. It can happen both in and out of school and is occasionally so upsetting and distressful it can lead to other problems such as self-harming or eating disorders.

So how do you know if you are being bullied? Here are some guidelines as to what is unacceptable behaviour from others.

Physical bullying

  • Hitting, pushing or knocking you over
  • Locking you in or out of rooms/toilets
  • Forcing you to do things against your will
  • Taking things away from you
  • Damaging your property

Emotional bullying

  • Threatening behaviour
  • Getting you into trouble
  • Teasing or name calling to your face or about you to others
  • Sending nasty telephone calls, texts or e-mails again to you or to others about you
  • Isolating you from your friends leaving you feeling all alone

What can you do if you are being bullied?

One thing is for sure, bullying won’t stop by itself. Bullies are almost always looking for a reaction from you and the more they see how upset you are the more inclined they will be to continue with their bullying ways.

It could be that by simply ignoring them they will get bored and move on.

Most bullies are cowards and if you feel brave enough you may want to challenge them in front of others, asking them what their problem is. If they bully you, there is every chance they bully others too and if these people see you standing up for yourself they will be more inclined to join you in your fight to stop their behaviour.

Speak to an adult it could be a teacher or a member of your family, or if you find it hard to speak about what is happening, write them a little note.

There are lots of great websites you can visit for more advice such as Beat Bullying or Childline on 0800 1111. Just by speaking to someone you will be starting to take back control of your life.

What can you do if you know someone who is being bullied?

Let this person know they have your support, even if it’s just being there to listen when they feel upset.

With a group of friends let the bully know how unhappy you are with their treatment of this person.

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Comments

Grace

I don't know if this is bullying but I get a lot of people talking about me behind my back about my appearance, body and style preference. I know they do it in PE I hear the popular girls talking about me. It really gets me down. I sort of told my friends but I hate talking about it, as it makes me seem so weak but sometimes I feel like I am about to cry with the insults they say. Any advice would be appreciated x

Lonely

I am in year 8 and am being bullied terribly by both boys and girls for reasons like: Because i am Norwegian, because i do what makes me happy even if its a bit weird, because i stand up for myself and because i don't have many friends. its really hard for me and i quite often don't know what to do. The teachers aren't any help because once when the most popular and bratty girl in my class took my bag and tossed it in the nettles so i spent my entire lunch trying to fish it out, i pulled the girls hair and punched her in the back but i just got a detention from the teachers and once when a boy called me a b**** and kicked in my locker i swore back at him and the teachers told me off for swearing when he had damaged my property and insulted me. This all happens every day and some days i just want to give up does anyone have any ideas?

bunny wabbit :)

idk if this is really bullying or not but sometimes people I know will put me down because of the way I look and don't even care that what they said was wrong... :(

Hey

I got bullied at primary school alot by a girl who was supposed to be my BFF I did do like BFF cards and that stuff but she really was never I only did that because I was scared to do it to others and not her. The thing is, she said when I did a test on it "please stay in this school" but she forgot to mention "please stay on this school so I can bully you." Although then I was too shy, I eventually started ignoring her and did't really care about her. In another school (This one I told my mother and moved) I got physically bullied they pushed me and did't ever let me do stuff I wanted to like playing and otherstuff anyway I had no really friends I stayed at that school for about a month then I stood up to then :) do not let bullies win 😀

Reply to XOXO_MAE_XOXO

Omg i feel so sorry for you. I think you should tell a teacher or something cos this sounds real serious

@ XOXO_MAE_XOXO

That is really unexeptable. I am sorry that I have no other better advice. I have never faced this problem before except with my sister. Maybe ask Vicki.

Jill

Everyone thinks I’m gay :/ even my mom. I’m not gay, but I get asked or teased at least once a day. The Bi kids at school tell me I have a “gay vibe” and it’s my personality.

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